Tikkun Olam: Honoring the Embryos That Shaped Our Journeys Without Becoming Live Births

by Chelsey Zane 

Tikkun Olam is a Jewish phrase which means to repair the world. There are so many day-to-day examples that we can give. We can give tzedakah, we can daven(pray) in shul(synagogue), we can volunteer, the list goes on and on. 

So, what if I told you that on November 8^th, 2024, the world was repaired in a way that it never was before? What if I told you that for the first time to the very best of my knowledge in Jewish history, we did something to repair the world that went beyond the physical world itself? What if we did something that would forever change the world in a way that would improve it? 

I, Chana Eliana, am the product of many prayers to Hashem and IVF (invitro-fertilization). My Hebrew name is Chana Eliana meaning Hashem has finally answered. My parents went through not 1 or 2 or 3 IVF cycles but 6 IVF cycles to get me here. I am also the one and only living child of my parents, Leah Zelda and Shmuel.

Throughout my life I always felt that I wanted to make my parents, ancestors as well as other special beings very proud. These special beings are my embryo siblings. 

In the cycle that resulted with me coming into the world, there were 5 other embryos and before the cycle that I came along, there were other embryos as well, that unfortunately were not born as their transfers were unsuccessful.

Nonetheless, these embryos forever changed my life. To me, the very fact that these embryos existed means that they had an impact. As people we see time by the second, minute and hour. However, our concept of time is very different from what Hashem sees. 

I believe that Hashem sees time as things that must happen at a certain moment for reasons that we may or may not understand. Although the time that I made my entrance into the world, it was not the time for my embryo siblings to become fully formed people, their existences had purposes. Although their existence was short in time, their impact on my life was everlasting. They changed my life and will forever have a place in my heart. See, without them I wouldn’t be the person that I am today. They are a part of me, they are my family and are a link to my family’s past, present and future. 

They give me a feeling that even though I do not have siblings on earth, I have siblings in heaven. Siblings that I hope will watch over my parents and I and that will know that we as a family are doing our very best to live our lives in ways that are meaningful to each one of them. 

And maybe just maybe part of the reason why they existed was so that November 8^th, 2024, would happen.

For many years, I had a dream of finding a way to honor my embryo siblings. I wanted to do something to recognize them and all others like them who did not live. I wanted to do something for all who have experienced such a loss because it is a loss that most people do not talk about. 

And on November 8^th, 2024, we had a beautiful outdoor ceremony in the Artist Colony in Jerusalem, Israel during which time we finally did so. We had a small ceremony where we officially recognized all embryos, fetuses and stillborns whose existence did not result in live births. 

During the ceremony, my parents and I donated a plaque which was created by artist, Oshrit Raffeld, to the Keren Gefen Center, “a non profit organization that provides emotional and wellness support to fertility challenged women in Israel.” 

Here is the translation of the plaque. 

The words in the center of the plaque are from a famous quote by Rav Kook:

כשהנשמה מאירה גם שמים עוטי ערפל מפיקים אור נעים
“When the soul shines, even a misty sky produces a pleasant light”

Rav Kook

Around those inner words, the three priestly blessings are written:

יברכך ה׳ וישמרך׃ יאר ה׳ פניו אליך ויחנך׃ ישא ה׳ פניו אליך וישם לך שלום
May Hashem bless you and safeguard you: May Hashem illuminate His countenance for you and be gracious to you: May Hashem turn His countenance to you and establish peace to you.

The words in blue are truth (אמת), kindness (חסד), love (אהבה), brotherhood (אחווה), peace (שלום), and commandments (וצות)

The words in black small letters are additional prayers:

ותתן לנו חיים ארוכים חיים של שלום חיים של טובה חיים של פרנסה חיים של חלוץ עצמות חיים של יראת שמים ויראת חטא חיים שאין בהם בושה וכלימה חיים של עושר וכבוד חיים שתהא בנו אהבת תורה ויראת שמים חיים שימאלו משאלות לבנו לטובה אמן סלה
And give us a long life, a life of goodness, a life of blessing, a life of sustenance, a life of pioneer bones, a life of reverence for Hashem and fear of sin, a life which there is no shame, and lead a life of wealth and respect, a life that instills in us love of Torah and fear of Hashem, a life that fulfills the wishes of our children for the best, Amen Selah.

The outer words are from Psalms 128, lines 5 and 6:

יברכך ה׳ מציון וראה בטוב ירושלים כל ימי חייך וראה בנים לבניך שלום על ישראל
May Hashem bless you from Zion and see well Jerusalem all the days of your life and you should see children to your children. Peace upon Israel.

In the plaque there are pomegranates and grapes to symbolize fertility. The plaque is also decorated with exquisite colors and patterns. 

To those of you who are going through assisted reproduction, please remember that many are proud of you. You are making a difference in the world through your bravery and courage. Please stay strong like a tree and stand firm with your roots. Sway with the wind when life moves you in different directions. Know that your branches are special and inspiring. It is my wish for the buds on your branches to blossom with beautiful flowers soon. 

Thank you for all that you do each day. You are helping to create the nation of Israel.

We pray that this plaque will bring you peace, comfort and the knowledge that all of your efforts are honored. We hope that this plaque will enable you to have strength to move forward and continue your journeys in motherhood as well as fatherhood. 

We also believe that through this project, when the Mashiach finally comes, all embryos, stillborns and fetuses will have been recognized on earth in a beautiful and unique way. This historic event to the best of my knowledge is the world’s first event ever created like it. Together, we were able to repair the world by creating a brand-new chapter and start for these beings. This start begins with these beings and continues from generation to generation.   

This project marks a new chapter for the world. It is my dream that this bright new beginning will make the world a better place. I also think that through this project, it will encourage people to talk about their fertility journeys. I also hope that it will motivate people like me to talk about what it means to them to be the products of assisted reproduction. 

I think that in this world if we come together for a greater cause, we can make a greater change. We can choose life and celebrate all facets of life together. 

On November 8^th, we closed the event with Eliad’s spectacular song, “I’ve Always Dreamed”. I felt that this song fit so well with the event because it captured the very essence of a dream. The song speaks to the triumphs and perils along the way that occur while making a dream possible. It also sheds light on the significance of being happy along the way and having faith. 

I hope that this post brought you a feeling of happiness in knowing just how incredible you and all your efforts truly are. I feel very blessed to be able to share the highlights of November 8^th, 2024 with you. 

Thank you to Rabbi Nissim Elnecave for his mentorship and guidance with this project, to Karen Friedman from the Keren Gefen Center for her support and Oshrit Raffeld for creating the plaque. 

I would like to thank the Jewish Fertility Foundation for including this story. Thank you to the Jewish Fertility Foundation in helping make Jewish people’s dreams possible. Your impact is nationwide and everlasting to the Jewish people. 

Thank you for being a part of the inspiration behind this monumental tribute.